ODE TO COMIC TATTOOS

Come listen to the story
of Comic Tattoos,
a quaint little booth
where you just can't lose.
The prices and pictures
are hanging outside.
No, the tattoos won't
fly off on a ride!
The tattoos don't hurt.
They just tickle a bit.
If you like what you see,
why not buy a kit?
We can write a name
for two dollars more.
And yes, these are different
from those in the store.
I'm sorry...We cannot
do anything custom.
Oh, Little Miss Henna does?
Well, I wouldn't trust 'em.
You can change the colors
except for the black.
Do the Water Park first
but be sure to come back.
You want the flower?
That's perfect-- indeed!
But sweetheart, the number
is what I will need.
That's $9.45.
I know it says nine.
There's sales tax remember.
Ten dollars, that's fine!
What color would you
like for your flower, Miss?
No, I have not gone to
Art school for this.
The bathrooms, oh yeah...
they're just past the fountain.
Oh, Please everybody,
Stop all the shoutin'!
I'm sorry, the tattoo
won't transfer on hair.
And, no sir, I can't
put a tattoo down THERE!
It won't last as long
on your stomach or neck.
But hey, it's for fun,
Why not?  What the heck!
If you don't like what's here,
There's airbrushing too.
Please try to decide
between light and dark blue.
You want that long armband?
Two-fifty-eight?
She'll be happy to help you.
I'm going on break.
The tattoos will last you
up to five days.
Put plenty of powder on
during that phase.
If it gets wet, don't rub it.
Just pat it dry.
I'm sorry, no Superman 'S'.
Please don't cry.
Yes we already know
that this didn't hurt
as much as your real one.
Don't bother to flirt.
"Straight Up Now Tell Me"
is on once again.
We're ready to rip out
the speakers by ten.
You're not wearing lotion
or sunscreen you say?
Well I guess you're just
awfully dirty today.
We don't use real needles
so don't tell your kid
that they're inside the brushes--
too late, you just did.
Now he's all worried
and squirming about.
Well now it's not my fault
if it doesn't come out.
I'm so glad you like it.
It will match your gown.
(I wonder what beauty means
when it's upside-down.)
The tattoo looks lovely.
It will darken up
in about fifteen minutes.
Hey, don't leave your cup!
Well this is the story
of Comic Tattoos
Day in and day out...
You just cannot lose!
   -Christina Blair